Frost on the Windowsill

SIF ASGAUT

She had completely lost focus on both of the boys as Sheik spoke her mind, finding herself slowing in pace as her lone eye fell onto her daughter and mild surprise formulating along the fixture of her brow. It wasn’t the first time one of her daughters had asked her to join the army and she had been rather swift to shatter Aurora’s dreams without a second thought because the flower was so frail. She shouldn’t be surprised that another of her children, especially one of Tiamat blood would strive for a war path and yet it still didn’t fail to make her stare for a few moments, trying to rationalize why such a sweet thing would want to partake but it was clear the one of gold had thought long and hard on it. A smile almost touched her lips at the thought, happy this at least wasn’t a rushed decision as an explanation was being introduced just as quickly as the idea.

At least one of these two actually didn’t just run towards something because they thought it was cool.

It was reasonable, seeing no flaw in the young girl’s logic and it put her at a stalemate on offering a quick rejection. Sheik was healthy and able, not to mention outgrew her as she no longer had to lower her head to make eye contact. She always thought she would be happy to hear a child wanting to serve as she had, that was far from the truth as discomfort at the idea rolled in her stomach and chewed at her heart. “I can teach you to fight, Sheik,” came out the immediate thought, rather than just saying yes or no because her own decision was foggy at best as she let out a sigh.

An ear twitched as she was tempted to meet Khepri’s eyes, kind of wanting him to be the bad cop for a change but she knew he wasn’t very good at that, and he probably expected this outcome. Perhaps it would be wiser to talk it over, to discuss it with what they all wanted yet she would not postpone an answer if she could help it.

She didn’t believe Sheik knew what she was trying to walk into, especially since Sif herself kept what she did at work rather quiet and away from the kids. “You do realize murder can be part of the job, right? I’ve killed many wolves, Sheik, to the point I’ve lost count. Many of your blood on both sides have done the same. Do you think you can handle potentially taking a life to save another?” her gaze never leaving those shimmering blues. "The army isn't to learn self-defense. It's to defend the lives of others and uphold the order of this land."

table by rae - manip by amphi

"I can teach you to fight, Sheik," said her mother, and at this the girl perked up a bit. She wasn't necessarily interested in violence but she did see the importance in knowing how to protect ones self at the very least. It was all she really wanted and she thought that she would get that by joining the Army like the rest of her family. The only one who hadn't remained among the ranks of the Army was her father, who taught at the college instead. She didn't think she was smart enough for all that so where did it leave her? Her ears twitched on her head, tilting back slightly a little in dismay at her own thoughts. She didn't get a chance to say anything before her mother eventually continued, explaining to her that what she was asking for might not be exactly what she wanted.

Horror filled her gaze at the thought of ending someone's life but what if that was what must be done to protect herself or someone else, like Haskell? She couldn't imagine it; couldn't fathom it... and yet, she knew her mother was not lying.

The conversation her father and brother had been having fell away and she looked at her mother, wondering how she lived with the weight of her job on her shoulders if it was more gruesome than she thought it to be. "I..." she said, now hesitating and having trouble finding the right words. "I want to protect myself and others. I want to be able to do that..." she said, doubling down on that part at the very least. The rest of it? Was that something she could live with herself? She would never really know until she was truly faced with it, she supposed.

"If that's what has to happen, I don't know what else there would be to do," she added. There were so many other options than death and yet she knew that sometimes that was all there was. "I want to be brave and strong like you, Mama." she admitted. She was tired of feeling scared every time she left home. She stopped by the lake, ears tilted forward now upon her head as she took a seat. She had a lot to think about now that her mother had put things into perspective...

exit sheik via chatting with the fam & enjoying the lake view

manip + code: clae

He was silent as he watched his family, not enjoying the tensions that seemed to be everywhere yet none were aimed at him, they never seemed to be unless he did something outright against mama. Deep honey eyes danced between them as they spoke, barely registering that his father had asked him a question at all. It seemed unimportant compared to what was happening in front of him, taking in further the idea of his sister leaving him for something he didn’t think she belonged in. He always thought she would be a healer, be the life to his death. She was a lot like their dad so it would make sense. Maybe he’d mention it to her later when they were alone and away from the influence of their parents and this so-called vacation that didn’t seem to be making anyone smile more than before coming here. Slowly those orbs would shift up to the man of tawny, ears flicking as he offered a small, tired smile. “Nothing has changed Papa. I told auntie I’d be a pyromancer and I don’t intend to change that. I want to honor the dead, even more now than ever before. I want to give others a warm welcome into their next life and take away the pain from others in this life. Fire also should be celebrated and not just feared,” he said with determination in his eyes and a definitive tone. He wouldn’t waver. He would do everything in his power to make his wish from his toddler days come true. “I see it... at the funerals. Everyone looks so scared or sad when the flames spark. We are the fire. We are each other! If I die next, I don’t want anyone sad, I want them to celebrate the life I did have instead of crying for losing me!” he chirped as he spoke his newest thoughts on the subject into the air as if to test it and see if it sounded just as good as it did in his head. That tiredness would fade a little as he nodded to himself, igniting a new passion under his paws to take on. Soon he could truly get into the field, not just listen to the old man with the tomes and he would be the one to take his place. Without waiting for his father’s response, if he had anything to say at all, he’d run toward the lake with new energy. He had to be strong not for himself but everyone else here! First thing was first, it had been a long time since he really played. Once Sheik got away from mama, they would snag the chance to try to get her to play fight. -exit plotting some shenanigans-

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Khepri's lips curved into a smile at Haskell's words, despite the somber mention of death. He wished he had had such a desire to do something like that when he was younger, then perhaps he might've been able to make his parents as proud as he was of his own children. Both Haskell and Sheik had a path they wished to take and he was happy for them, despite it not being a path he might take himself. He would help them as much as he could, and their mother would too, but their achievements would largely be their own. "I'm sure you'll make a great pyromancer, then." he murmured before his son dashed off toward the lake to presumably play with his sister. He chuckled and turned his head to look at Sif, his honied eyes shining with pride. "I wish I'd known what I wanted at that age," he commented. "But as much as it might've made my life easier, I'm happy where I ended up." he added as he paced over to her and rubbed his muzzle against hers. He would settle beside the lake with her unless she trailed after Sheik and Hask to talk some more, though he hoped she might relax with him and watch the pair play just as they had done when they were younger. Back when things had been simpler. exit khepri "..."

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SIF ASGAUT

With Sheik’s shaky conviction of her choices, the gilded woman let out a wayward sigh, knowing there would be no point in trying to steer her away from such a path, not when she was well aware of the risks. At least, Sif hoped that was truly the case after losing Nassar so suddenly. The only other way the girl could truly know was to witness the battlefield herself but the mother wasn’t so quick to unleash the darling girl into such a cold world. The other had only seen the aftermath of tragedy, as far as she knew, there had never been an experience first hand. To know pain in the most primal sense was far different than mental anguish. Some fared better with it, like the hardened executioner while others couldn’t handle the raking of claws and puncturing of teeth.

Ears would twitch as she observed those crystal eyes, a smile slowly taking form as she shook her head. “We can discuss it more when we are home. For now, enjoy being a child. Please. It’s more of a blessing than you know to be able to be as free as you are from strife,” she said warmly, the sharpness gone from her tone as she moved forward to place a tender kiss upon a pale brow.

She watched as both of the children took to moving next to the lake of so many memories, finding herself in no less company as her husband would close the space to join her. As if taking her own advice, she wouldn’t allow her current ires ruin what was supposed to be a peaceful time away from all the tolls the weight of the world had created. Carefully, she would return the nuzzling, keeping the chill away from her touch. His comment would cause a bittersweet glimmer in her eye, glancing at him only for a second before looking back to the two playful youths.

“It’s nice to see others allowed to make choices, no shackles or cages to mute their flames from a better destiny,” she replied after a long pause, knowing her own path had never been one she had made out of her own will. He only had after he had run from the family, a fugitive of his own blood. She didn’t want to restrict them if she didn’t have to. Slowly she would lead Khepri toward the water, where they once spoke before, leaning into the soft tawny pelt beside her. Letting herself live in a temporary bliss of a future she had always dreamed of. Living family here again.

-Thread End-

table by rae - manip by amphi